Why I'm not married ('08)

This letter of mine was published in the LATimes in Feb. 2008:

[My best letter (so far) on marriage]

I've been in a very long-distance monogamous relationship with a Mexican citizen for almost 15 years. In the 90s, we applied three times for a tourist visa for my partner to just visit me here in Los Angeles. The application was refused each time.

We gave up. I visit Mexico, and together, we've gone to Costa Rica and to Canada.

"Why not just get married?" you ask. That would be nice, but we're gay.